Hello all,

Everyone who submitted a paper electronically should have gotten their graded paper.

Food for thought:

I’m all for the scissors. I believe more in the scissors than I do in the pencil.
(Truman Capote in Conversations With Capote, by Lawrence Grobel, New American Library, 1985)

1) The submission date for revision is Wednesday after Spring break, March 21.  By day, I mean midnight.  If you need more time, you may request it.

2) You have two options to revise,  You may choose both, either, or neither.

3) Option 1 (new).  Rewrite a paragraph form original paper focusing on what Williams calls the “narrative style” in the chapters I have emailed or handed out.  They are both attached here for your convenience.  I am also attaching five sentences from real, live student papers that are candidates for revising.  Feel free to play with them.  On the Tuesday after break, I will go over some more examples in class.

To do option 1, pick a paragraph from your paper and rewrite the paragraph and sentences to make the subjects the best choice for who or what would be the subject and what action the subject is taking.  Read the chapters.  You will give me, electronically and in print, the original and the revised paragraph.

If you have done good revisions, you get a half-letter grade boost to your original grade (c->c+; b+->a- and so on).

4) Option 2 (old).  Rewrite the whole paper.  A rewrite is substantive.  It is _more_ than fixing sentence level problems.  You will likely bring in new material, revise your argument, move sections of text, delete some parts, and add some.  As I said in class, it is like making sausage: ugly to watch, but everyone likes the end result.

Your new paper will get a new grade.  There is no guarantee it will improve.  Last semester, out of about 60% re-writing, most people improve a half to whole letter grade.  One or two had no change (because they didn’t really rewrite much, so, essentially, it was the same paper).


“You can’t wait for inspiration.  You have to go after it with a club.” 
Jack London

5) Rough decision guidelines.  I wrote these on board.


Should I Rewrite?
Did you get a B+ or an A-?  You probably only need to do option 1.
Did you get in the “B” range?  Your rewrite may be mostly about the development of your argument and then how you develop that throughout the structure of your paper.  You may also need to add more sophistication by more clearly discussing the relationship between social science and ethics, between what is and what should.  You may also need to re-assess or deepen how you use an ethical theory or perspective or bring OTHER readings into your discussion.

Did you get a C+?  Your rewrite will involve more substantial thinking and development of your core idea or argument.  A reverse outline or some other whole-paper revision is probably in order.  Along with this, everything from the B range may also be useful.  The cases often have more information than you realize.  For example, in the Nike case, can you estimate the impact of increasing labor costs on Nike’s bottom line?  You may benefit from making your argument and then also imagining what a critic of your position would say.  Many of our readings come with a paired critique.

6) The partial reverse outline we did of one of the sample papers is attached.  Please remember that we edited this in class.  So, you don’t see the initial reverse outline. One piece of advice I have if you do a reverse outline is that you want to hold off on making changes until you finish the whole thing.

If you have more questions, please ask.  I am here to help you become a better writer.

There is no great writing, only great rewriting. ~ Justice Louis Brandeis

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